silk handkerchiefs (not pocketsquares in any way)
don’t pollute the environment every time you blow snot,
our machine washable handkerchiefs will become family mementos,
when you tell your pre-teen grandchild or niece,
“darling, this silk has collected my tears for forty years.”
fiend skull tailcoats
perfect for making the most formal occasions ironic,
take in legitimate theater in style,
skateboard down the Seine,
freakout a ballet or an opera, and count the raised eyebrows,
make a statement at your next event or party.
martini glass cozi
now, where the hell do I find some cheap martini glasses?
(now available for sherry glasses and liqueur glasses,
however, red wine should always be drunk from the bottle.
white wine is simply not done.
there is no irony in anything That sophisticated)